If life would stay the same
We could deal with the pain
Does anything ever last
Some slow- some fast
Play all nite, work all day
Time will make you pay
Love is found, love is lost
The heart knows the cost
Reckless and dangerously
foolish responsibility
Care for yourself
Before someone else
First you slide, then fall
Keep against the wall
Watch your step, ask for help
Do not travel roads,
You do not know
Always dress you best
Go hard,then rest
Stay clean, not mean
You must cope, say no to dope
Do not smoke, it is no joke
Try to learn all the ropes
Steer clear of fear
Keep your conscious alway near
Keep your mind always sharp
Do not bitch, do not harp
Learn the rules of the game
Rules change, do the same
Keep people arms lenght away
Most leave, friends stay
Do not be dumb, stay in school
Doing time is for fools
Peace and serenity help enormously
Do not rock the boat
Fall in, swim or float
Watch where you step
Afraid, except help
Do not run away
Winners always stay

Re: Life Rules
Stephano, I like the overall message and rhyming manner. I usually do not come up with many rhymes at a time, so it's cool you are able to.
I'll help polish it up at places... and my suggested homework for you is to remove/replace the rhymes where they have been forced - or where the meaning has been compromised for rhyme.

Should the title be "Life's rules"?

quote:

Does anything ever last
Some slow- some fast

"Some" and "anything" don't tally. How about making line 2, "sometimes slow - sometimes fast"? Actually I'm not sure what it should be changed to, just that you might change it... (I know, bad way to critique!)

quote:

Reckless and dangerously
foolish responsibility

The two lines seem to be missing something... any ideas on what you'd like to modify if you find them incomplete too?

quote:

Do not travel roads,

I am not sure about the grammar, but playing-by-ear I'd add in a "Do not travel THROUGH roads"

quote:

Always dress you best

-your

quote:

Go hard,then rest

"Work hard", is that better? Or maybe "go hard at it, then rest"?

quote:

Keep your conscious alway near

You imply conscience (inner judgement), not conscious (mental alertness). Always. Further, I'd exchange "near" for "clear" - I get that you imply that our conscience shouldn't be afar from our actions, however "clear conscience" suits better.

quote:

Keep people arms lenght away

Typo.

quote:

Afraid, except help

Not except ("excluding"), but accept ("permit/welcome").
Please know that it's your work and your choice, what to change. Don't feel forced to; and know that I'm not the ultimate judge.
I like your last two lines especially.
Thought-filled work!

"A speck of hope traverses eternity." –me, letswriteandshare

LWAS- So good to hear from you. I twisted my ankle and have been unable to get around. I see the typo's and my grammer is terrible. I always thought that this piece could be a rap song. That was my reasoning for the short lines. Some cowboy has come up with a country rap song. So much for being first. I will probably still put it to music.
I just totally missed consceince and accept.
Take responsibility
Don't live foolishly

Some live slow , some live fast

Live hard then rest

I appreciate you responding. I have this style of writing that I have used several times and I was'nt sure how it came across. What do you think about these changes. One more thing. The way we talk around here you would think we had no formal education. It's a curse or a blessing depending on how you look at it.

To me you travel roads. You fly through clouds. Maybe, Do not travel on roads, would be better.
LWAS let me hear what you think.
Your buddy

I think your changes make it much better buddy! Terrible grammar is ok (mine is too), regarding the typos you may run it through spell check on MS Word in future.

"A speck of hope traverses eternity." –me, letswriteandshare